Category Archives: Personal

Behind an Open Door


If only tomorrow would fail to come
And this burden from her chest were lifted,
There was no end, this day were simply done,
This were the number of her days gifted.
There was sleep she sought, and the sleep sought her,
Flattering, that the void felt incomplete.
Eternity and nothing now a blur,
Like the moment a dog dies in the street.
She sits there and thinks and opens her eyes,
And stares at the next soul who might save hers.
So many moments, this too passes by,
What if she’s made to go on as a curse?
Unique. Never again, never before,
She tries to hide behind an open door.

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To Fear Change

I am the only one here
It is obvious others have gone on before me,
I’m sure more will follow.
I am alone.
However a lonely lie I do repeat
You cannot convince me otherwise.
I fall,
And upon climbing back up from the valley
The echo of a lonely lie calls back from afar.
The path is barren.
I descend into fog for fear of reaching the summit.

The Foolish


The foolish wait for these thoughts to expire.
The foolish wait.
The foolish breathe.
I am a verbose vessel of void.
The real miracle would seem
To be something from nothing,
But the taste of this cure,
This cursed alkaloid,
This, “others king”,
Is not who I want to serve.
The foolish wait.
The foolish expire.
I too wait.
But between me and a fool I shall conspire.

To Argue With the Vessel

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A fragile crutch of flesh and bone,
Supports another wounded soul.
Water argues with the vessel
In which it is contained,
Progress made is infinitesimal,
Naught but vanity is gained.
A smile on pained lips and three
Unused wishes at days end may see,
This day again becoming night,
This tired form and I,
Simply wait for morning and new sight.
Where life and death combine.

Tinnitus

The silence doesn’t help much to keep my ears from bleeding.
So why not leave the torrent sound alone, it will not change the pain I’m feeling.
All at once I forget and then the same remember,
It returns full vengeance every bleak September.
A clear sky, a .44,
Was the cause I’m blaming. For
This sound, after all these years,
Still this cursed ringing in my ears.

My Favorite Season

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I long for the days to grow shorter.
The heat to fade and the cold to grow harsher.
Spring only leads to summer, and fall not close enough,
Throughout the year, too much tangled up stuff.
Give me the storms and rain and snow,
As long as their wind remains cold.
Until the sun grows cold and gives us less light,
I’ll pretend I’m sleeping, I’ll pretend it’s night.

I Found Myself Awake

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I don’t remember waking up, I am simply here.
Much like this, my dying then, will one day appear.
Between day and night, this transition,
Between waking and dreaming, those conditions,
The boundary seemed to fade.
Across this river, there was no toll that my soul was meant to pay.
Suddenly I’m dreaming, and just the same awake.
Suddenly I don’t remember when my sleep was forced to break.
Later I shall tire and to another dream then drift,
Where afterwards I’ll remain unable to recall such a rift.